Something fun and myspace reminiscy.

It's been going around the blogosphere, especially the girly and preppy ones. I wanted something fun to do and if I can get it from someone who is 26 then I am not too old for this.




A. Age: 21

B. Bed size: Double. I got a beautiful white iron bed from Pottery Barn when I was in fifth grade. I only have part of it in use now, but when I get back to my parent's house I'm going to pick up the rest.

C. Chore you dislike: I don't have a dishwasher in this apartment so I have to do everything by hand. I usually end up doing a large pile twice a week. Gross I know.

D. Dogs: I want a Siberian Huskey or a Klee Klai but not an Alaskan one. Someday when I have a yard, I'll have the dog, just hopefully not in the Morrisville house.

E. Essential start to your day: Checking my e-mail, CONSTANTLY. It's a dirty habit I picked up from ROTC.

F. Favorite color: Navy blue.

G. Gold or silver: Silver, almost always silver.

H. Height: 5'5"

I. Instruments you play(ed): Saxophone. Since I was in fourth grade I've been playing in my schools' bands. I took a break from music this semester, but I'll be back in full swing in the fall when Mike gets back form Italy.

J. Job title: Student. Rawr.

K. Kids: Not today, thank you.

L. Live: "All in all, I'd rather be in Philadelphia."

M. Mom’s name: MA!

N. Nicknames: I'm slowly getting rid of them.

O. Overnight hospital stays: None just a million day visits. I'm pretty sure Lankenau has my insurance company on speed dial.

P. Pet peeves: Annoying downers. Get happy people! (I mean the people who are like this ALL of the time. Everyone's allowed a few bad days.)

Q. Quote from a movie: "These are my sons: Benny and The Jets. I expected this from you Benny...but The Jets?!"

R. Righty or lefty: Right!

S. Siblings: Samantha. She has a tattoo and I'm going to define her by that for a while until I get bored with it.

T. Time you wake up: As late as I can, I need to start getting up earlier.

U. Underwear: Lot's of lace!

V. Vegetables you don’t like: Lima beans. Yuck!

W. What makes you run late: Not being able to find my keys that I already put in my pocket.

X. X-rays you’ve had: All over. I've even had my brain done!

Y. Yummy food you make: Apple anything! It comes from my love of fall in Vermont.

Z. Zoo animal favorites: Pandas!

Definitely not your grandmother's fellatio.

"I think all of us would rather have oral sex than throat cancer."

Yes, Mike I think we would. Especially early in the morning. Today in Journalism we discussed a photo that appeared on the cover of a Florida college newspaper of a guy performing cunnilingus on a scantily dressed woman. The photo caused a stir of controversy about whether or not it was relevant to the story of people possibly developing throat cancer after having oral sex with people who are infected with HPV. It sparked quite the debate in class about the boundaries in journalism and whether or not the story could have been sold without the photo. Now personally I think that the story was relevant to college students and I wouldn't have needed the photo to pick the paper up and read, but I don't see any reason that the newspaper should have been penalized for it. In fact I like the photo. Not for journalistic reasons, but because of the taboo subject matter given and the roles that were assigned to the man and woman. It's not you typical oral sex scene, well it is for most people but not the kind that gets printed often. It is rare that women get shown in a position of power in a sex scene. Very often its the woman performing the act on a man and the scene is very lewd and crude. I appreciated the photo chosen by the newspaper and the clean and powerful image that they produced. Oral sex, especially cunnilingus is still the naughty no-no for many  (silly) people and it was nice to see college students who have moved past a back of the bus lipstick game.

Remember to get yourself checked.

Outside of journalism, but still in the realm of writing, I have decided to make my fiction piece more pulpy and exaggerated. I got a lot of surprising feedback from my classmates. They loved the story and they want me to push the limits with it. I think tonight when I get back I'm going to revise another draft so I have a hard copy to give to My Hebrew Friend to go over for me. I think I'll just print him out a copy this time and let him write all over it. I found it most helpful when people wrote on their so I knew exactly where to go back and make changes with it. 

Ode to Fusco

I got up, I didn't want to.
I have a cold, a sore, throat, my muscles still hurt,
But I still got up.
And you weren't there.
We waited and waited, some sitting, some standing.
I knelt on my knees, praying to be cancelled.
You came and the door was locked.
I swear I saw some people walk away, but I stayed.
Not for you, but for:
Chopin
Robinson
Howells
James....the list continues

And of course the Manet you couldn't hang because the tape wouldn't unravel for you.
We're not eight anymore, standing between a poster is no longer fun.
But now neither is listening to you and your self-proclaimed boring lectures.
You stare at me, right into my sleepy eyes.
Why do I always have to sit in the front row?
Mick speaks and I can see the boredom in even your eyes.
I'm quick to answer the trivia:
en plein air
Ten Little Indians
Shot by his own men.

My only class of the day and I still got up.
The abandoned perfect paragraph you forgot about is still in my notebook,
And your indecipherable writing is all over my paper.
I'm nodding, I'm gone, my glasses are on my desk.
The clock hand continue their path and I am out of there.
See you on Thursday.

Shopping in the boys department.

I had two things I was thinking about earlier today and one of the I completely forgot about. One was about me and the other one was probably about about me but not so indirectly, but then I forgot about it. So instead I will share my joy that I got to color in class today. My teacher brought in a 64 count box of crayons and I went to town depicting a scene from Heart of Darkness. And now that I am writing this I realized that the other thing was about my new path as short pulp fiction writer. Apparently my classmates really enjoyed the idea with my story, but they were conflicted about whether they thought it should be dark and mysterious or hammy and ridiculous. On guy thought that it had a pulpy vibe to it and so my teacher has tasked me with making it over the top and to push it to the limits of ridiculousness. I may even have to reference Samuel L. Jackson or a ridiculous vampire movie. We shall see. It also means more work for My Hebrew Friend who I've gotten for be my chief source of criticisms and suggestions with this piece. I struggle with fiction more so than with other genres and I need him to make sure things don't get too out of hand.

The other thing that I was thinking about was relationship and how I sort of accidentally fall into them. My friends are all in different stages in their lives and in different places in the world of romance, but none of them seem to have the same process as me. Of course it's all the same for every one: person meets person. For me though I can't seem to just meet a person and instantly be dating them. I start out as friends and over time something changes for me and I start to see them differently and somehow we end up as more than where we started. Right now most of the guys that I am close with are already with other people or I haven't found the others to be right for me in that way yet. It's a particular process for me somehow that I still can't seem to nail down. I'm kind of nervous though because what if I finally end up with someone right before I have to leave. Conundrum. But also a bridge that I'll cross if it gets to that. I'm finally in a good place with Yonni where I feel comfortable alone with him to be myself without the pretensions of sex looming over us, or my need to not say anything wrong around him, or doing something that would make him not like me. It's taken awhile, but now I don't feel bad critiquing him about something or telling him about anything. It's the same with Dan. I wrote a story about us for my non-fiction piece. Andi says that he will be one of those guys I will always "feel something for" but writing that story was like letting go of a lot of stuff that I was holding on to. Growing my hair out was like a liberation from him.

Okay so I never really finished, I just stopped and went to work instead of just saving. The best part of the day after coloring with crayons and the discussion I had with Amy in class about how desirable Marlon Brando is in Streetcar despite how crazy the character and the Dr. Green agreeing with us and then it turning to Marlon Brando weighing 200 pounds more than he was supposed to for Apocalypse Now which was mot excellent, was my trip to sketchy Kohl's down on Township Line. Seriously this store looks so out of the place on the side of the road. It looks like it's in a small field on the edge of a swamp. But that's DelCo for you. Anyways...women have stopped dressing formal in the work place I have found. I couldn't find a white button down anywhere. At least not a white collared one with a breast pocket. And believe me I tried Ross, two Targets, and a TJ Maxx. I had to shop the little boys department to find something that would fit. So so sad. But it's nice to know I not too fat that I have to shop in the men's section.

Also I have a killer sore throat and Arcade Fire's We Used to Wait is my new crack.

Sunday Funday. Samantha what are you thinking?

I feel tired and sore. I should have made Yonni put the Pain-A-Trait on my shoulder while he was still here. Gah what was I thinking? I have the worst actually-use-my-resources-when-Iave-them-at-the-time skills sometimes. Of course now that he's gone I'm actually starting to notice the pain in THE SHOULDER. I'm not a big fan of people rubbing IcyHot into me because they always have a weird touch and it is usually more painful than it should be, but THE SHOULDER is in the spot that I can never quite reach and have effective fingers on it. Yonni's giant man-palm would have been perfect for the task. Of course I suck at actually getting people to hit THE SHOULDER just right anyways so it probably would have been a total waste and he would have spent the rest of his night with a wintergreen smelling palm.

THE SHOULDER hurts because of my awesome ice hockey game today against Villanova. It was great; we had a better turnout than the women's basketball team, which is funny because this was our first game ever. We lost of course, but we did score a goal and we didn't loose by ten like we did at Navy. Missed that game so I don't really have anything to compare the team's playing too, but they did great. HUGE improvement since we started together in the fall. Guy being there last practice really helped us out. His drills really made a lot of the girls realize what hockey is about: skating.We might have another game and we're definitely going to be in the league so next year I'm going to have to invite some of my friends to the games. T said he invited Dr. A. so next time he has to come. Miss that guy. And Ginger Dan totally let T down, but hey she gets out of McGroddy now if she wants.

Other News of the Night: I finally finished The Dark Knight. I know, it only took me a week. I watched it with Yonni who kept saying all of the lines before they happened and I wanted to smack him, but then I just got used to it and it started being really funny by the end. ALSO Samantha supposedly got a tattoo. I'm not entirely sure that it's real just yet or if she's lying to my mom to freak her out, but all signs so far point to real. Seriously Samantha? You won't have sex, but you'll get a tattoo? Personally I'd go with the sex. If you're safe it's way less permanent and you can hold it over your mother forever. So much fun in a Catholic guilt sort of way. Plus you get to see a whole other side of Aunt Val. I toyed with the idea of getting one once either a physics joke about Newton's apple with e=mc^2 (it's the world) or my husband's name on the inside of my thing up near you know where. Kind of trashy and way too permanent. I think I'd rather spend the money on a boat someday and just have sex with my husband in the sun on it somewhere really really warm. 

An even worse title than my fiction piece.

I have The Carpenter's Superstar stuck in my head, but not the version by The Carpenters. It's the one done by Sonic Youth, the one people know from Juno when Jason Bateman gets all creepy on Ellen Page.

I just found out my journalism class is cancelled for tomorrow morning, which is both a good and a bad thing. Good because that class is getting annoying and draining and I've definitely come to the realization that while I have learned a lot about internet publication and multimedia presentation, I do not want to be a journalist. Sorry Aunt Sylvia, but you'll have to find another relation to follow in your footsteps. It's bad though because it now means I have more time to procrastinate working on my fiction piece that's due for workshop. I have to have fourteen copies to hand out in class so my classmates can tear it apart on Monday. I got a good start done before I went to work today and I only need another hour or so working at a solid pace to get a decent draft done for class. I just need to suck it up and do it.

Today practice was fantastic despite Lauren and I refusing to get out of the car and Lauren texting me a million times to make sure I would come get her at 5am. Thank god she texts me for a solid half hour before I get her otherwise I would just roll over and go back to sleep. Today Guy came and did a whole practice on skating. Not very technically challenging for me because of my background, but I definitely got a solid workout in. My body is soooo sore right now from skating on my butt Russian circles, but now everyone knows I can do a Shoot the Duck on both feet and ended up being demonstrator for half the drills. Not terrible because Guy and I ended up having a great chat about skating and how hockey is 90% skating and that everyone should start out with the intensive training that figure skaters go through. Most of the girls think that I'm naturally good on the ice, but they don't realize that I've been drilled and tested on cross-overs and edges for years and that I actually competed in events just for skating around the rink on my inside and outside edges. I had to put a lot of work, discipline, and muscle training into being able to do just half a lap of power pulls. The girls don't have to come close to what I do, but they need to realize that it takes a lot more to get even just good blade control than what they're giving now.

Rawr I wish my body didn't hurt so bad. Maybe the soreness will keep me awake long enough to finish my story or maybe I will just fall asleep ad wake up like a broke pretzel. We shall see...

Why so sleepy?

Snap, crackle, pop, FUCK! I hate that it's 11pm and I have all of this energy. Where was it this morning when the rain and cold made me sleepy and want to lay in bed all morning? I have l'hockey in the morning and I've tasked Lauren with making sure I come pick her up in the morning. The only thing that's motivating me is that this is out last morning practice of the semester and the idea of the super hot steamy shower that I plan on taking for a long while to warm up after power skating with Guy (pronounced Gee). Oh man that sounds good. Writing this is making me sleepy thank god and I can't believe that this is the second time this week that I've posted three times in a day. Writing this blog is the new vacuuming when it comes to procrastination. Guess who won't be going out tomorrow night since she didn't write her fiction piece today. Not that I really enjoy going out Thursdays anyways. It's too much after being up since 4am and having to get up again on Friday. I'll go out Friday when I'll have a chance to better enjoy my friends' company. Love my friends, especially some of my work friends. In fact I think I actually like my new work friends than some of my other friends that have been kind of lame recently. I should start reevaluating the people I have in my life and start separating myself from the people that haven't been very good for me. Poo, I love my friends, I don't really want to have to do that, but I need to take care of me first.

On a happier note I have become obsessed with all things that feel soft and fluffy on my nose when I get cold and sleepy. These soft items include the fuzzy lamb skin I keep in bed, nice smelling chest hair on attractive men, and flannel sheets. So if you know of anything or anyone that is incredibly soft, I am taking applications for the next cold and rainy day.

MUST MUST get some sleep tonight!

Mystery Team

"Theses are my sons, Benny and The Jets. I expected this from you Benny...but The Jets?!

Seriously you MUST WATCH this movie.

Fruit of the Awesome.

Oh my God Mom! You don't want to read this, it's about boy's underwear! Alright you can read it, but remember this me and not Samantha so make sure you call her and remember to have "the talk" with her. You know which one I mean, the one about not stealing boy's underwear because college boys do even less laundry than me if they can help it.

But yeah. I has to buy a bunch of white undershirts for and since no woman actually wears these past the age of eleven I had to rummage around the mens undergarments section at Target. SCORE FOR SIDNEY!! Ladies (and Jon) let me tell you something... these things are amazing and so comfortable. If I could have my way I would be living in these and nothing else. The only complaint I have is that the v-neck is cut very narrow, more like a slit than a V. Actually that's what I did yesterday after work. I paraded around the apartment in my white cotton shirt and the white hipsters that Victoria's Secret stopped making (sad) and nothing else. I ate some of the meatballs that I got from Aunt Val and watched the rest of The Dark Knight. And then I remembered that I had left my window in my bedroom ope so when I went to do my homework I had to bundle back up and just fell asleep. Oh so comfy. Anyways boys you're so lucky with your underwear. Even your boxer shorts are comfy comfy comfy. I used to buy boyfriends boxers that would mysteriously disappear from their dresser drawers. Not that I don't mind the pretty lacy articles that I keep for myself, it's just sometimes they can be uncomfortable and not so wonderful feeling like yours are. So thank you menswear.

I have to write a fiction piece for workshop on Friday. Pure fiction is not my forte when it comes to writing. When it came to flat out lying to my mother when I was eight, yes. Now, not so much. I have a few class segments that I can pull from, but actually getting a finished piece is going to take some work. I still have two days to come up with rough draft so we'll see where it ends up.

If I haven't told, I'm telling you now. Watch Mystery Team. Netflix has it for instant streaming and I can guarantee you won't be disappointed. It's a low budget comedy by a great up and coming young comedy troupe. Donald Glover from Community stars in it as a member of the children's crime solving Mystery Team that comes across a double homicide!

Case of the Mondays? Not me.

Father Feeny always asks us if we have the Mondays when he sees us all lined up outisde of Journalism and not looking super excited to be there. Father Feeny is the type of teacher who is always excited to talk about English and his classes and he always wants to know if we're having a good time. Of course when our teacher is fifteen minutes late to class you tend to not get super excited about having to stand in the hallway. Today was not a Case of the Mondays kind of day. It was raining which put a mild damper because I was so comfortable in bed. I looked like a giant star all limbs in all directions under my comforters and through the open window I could hear the rain pelting the side of the building. It was really relaxing and I had to push myself to get out of bed and to the car where I discovered that I had left a window open and the front door unlocked. Miraculously nothing was stolen or wet. You know that's it's going to be a good day when the stupid things you do end up being perfectly fine.

I got to school early so I could work on my sound/slide project. I took a chance in the Maguire parking lot and low and behold it was nearly empty. At 9am people usually have to fight for a spot. With the weather I guess not too many people wanted to go to class. Weather like this also keep security from checking for parking permits and so I end up without getting ticketed. Last night I got an email saying Creative Writing was going to be cancelled. I was a little disappointed because it's one of my more likeable classes, but I used the time to hang out with Eanan in the Perch. I haven't seen him or Devin or Andi lately because I've been busy and don't have a lot of time on the weekends to do anything during the day. We only have a little more than a month of school left in the semester so I'll be able to hang out with Andi then. Miss that girl.

I have my job orientation later this evening. Nervous/excited like I said before to see how it goes. It will be fine of course M said he might be in for dinner and I always find it weird to see for employers at new jobs. It always like, "Hey this is what I left you for!" Not really a big deal if I do. Allyson stopped by work last night and we talked for a while and we definitely agreed that M is totally skeezy sometimes and could stand to lose the shorts. It's not even warm outside. I should make plans to do something with her and Niambi sometime too.

I'm hoping orientation doesn't last more than an hour or two and then I can have my Monday nights free. I used to work Monday nights last semester and even though I haven't had to these past few months I still feel like there is something I should be doing. I'll figure it out, maybe I can get my Mom to buy me a class card for hot yoga. I need something to stretch me out and tone me up. Has anyone done hot yoga and really liked it?

Oh yes I forgot. I've started tracking my weight as a daily affirmation to loose it and to see where my base is and how far I need to go. Does anyone else have any little daily tricks to keep them motivated? I read that it takes about 28 days to build a good habit. I need something to puch me the first 28 days. Also has anyone triend the Be-hot supplements for women athletes from GNC and what do you think?

Peggy Sue

Peggy you know what a penis is. Stay away from it.

I watched Peggy Sue Got Married last night during my In Night. Zach Galifianakis recommended it to me the other day and despite the awful Nicolas Cage performance I really enjoyed it. It was funny to watch Kathleen Turner fall back into 1960 and relive all her regrets. Especially since 30 years later she would play the sexually hyperactive and formidably Sue Collini that we al know and love. The movie is full of throwbacks both in theme and character design which makes it entertain to watch. So thanks Zach for the recommendation.

Okay one and a quarter is enough for today.

Okay, okay never mind. I know that I said I was done for the day, but I just have so much on my mind that I need to spill it out. I also don't want to really do my theology homework so I'm writing and watching The Dark Knight instead. I haven't seen this movie in ages and it was between this and Watchmen and The Dark Knight won. Mostly because it is slightly shorter than the other movie. I've also recently come to the conclusion that I love Michael Cain. Gosh it's been quite the day for Sidney's self-realization (insert facetious laugh).

I went back and took a look at the last post I wrote and the stuff above and no wonder I'm single and alone, I'm insane. Whatever, moving on. Tomorrow I want to get up early and get stuff done, but I found out one of my classes has been cancelled and my mind is slowly trying to convince me that I should sleep in and the fact that I'm only just starting a long movie and I have homework to do is making sleeping in more and more appealing. I also have orientation for a new job tomorrow evening and I'm ridiculously excited and antsy. I like new experiences but I still get butterflies before they happen.

I talked to Anna a little bit tonight and I'm really glad I did because I haven't talked to her all semester and I miss her so much. She's going to the Black and White on Friday so I'll have to wait until later in the weekend to see her. Anna and I always have fun shenanigans and since she's staying on Hawk Hill for grad school I get to see her all summer. We may even dig up Ginger Dan and bring him out with us again. My summer is already being pre-planned for Llanerch pancakes and Guiness on the balcony.

I'm actually starting to get a little giddy about the summer. I have a whole different set of friends staying in the summer this year and I also have a bunch of new friends that I've made this year. I also haven't been offered the job at work that I'm hoping for. If I get it I will actually have some savings and some expendable income to play around with. With Twila on top of that I'm not so limited the way I was last year. I just need the pieces to fit into my summer puzzle. 

A moment of self-reflection.

I had all these ideas to write about all yesterday and this morning, but then a little while ago I read My Hebrew Friend's blog and it reminded me about all the stuff that is actually happening to me right now and I think that while all the ideas in my head can be very fun, what I really think and feel about things makes for better writing for me. And while I really do love and appreciate all of my readers and the input that they give me, this blog and my writing is for me. It's for me to be able to write down thoughts and try different things and get feedback and criticisms from other people to improve my own style. Everyone hates killing their babies, but that's what writing is all about.

But back to what spurred this post on. My Hebrew Friend wrote about feeling lost and getting back on track with his life and finally arriving in a place where he can be himself again. I feel like I am struggling in a similar way. When I really think about the last time I was ecstatic with my life and with myself was years ago, before I complicated myself with distractions and let bad experiences change me and make me weary about trying things again. I need to push myself to get back to a better place and to get the things I really want.

I'm in a good place right now with school and my friends and family. I need to start reaching out to some of my other friends that I haven't seen in a while, I'm tired of spending so many nights home alone, not that I minded last night (it was much needed) but I can't continue on this way. It's boring and I'm ashamed with myself for being so boring, I feel like there was a point when I didn't use to be like this. There are two things that I need to push myself to change: my weight and my personal life. I've been struggling with body image for a really really long time and though I've never been obese, I've never been in excellent shape and I've always been much larger in size than most of my friends. I'm not lazy person, I play sports and I've always tried to not sit around but ever since I've come to college I've consistently become more and more stagnant and less willing to exercise regularly. I used to say that I was too busy with school to get to the gym even when I had the time or that running a lap around the field with the club field hockey team was exercise enough for the week. I paid the price for my lazy thinking. I look like Santa's little sister. But then I was with a guy recently and they way he looked was looking at me when I took my clothes off gave me this amazing sense of confidence about myself. I don't even think he realized what he was doing, but it's made me realize that that's a feeling I want to have all of the time about myself. I'm not looking to become stick thin or look like the perfect image on the cover of a magazine, I want to get to a place where I can feel perfect about myself and be more confident when it comes to men. I look at the girls around me that are much thinner and prettier than me and I see their confidence and ease with men and the seemingly success that they seem to have. Too many times I've just jumped into bed with a guy because I felt like I was only good enough to be the late night sex that they were too ashamed to tell anyone about. I let this feeling consume me and eventually I believed that I could be happy just having sex and then sneak out in the middle of the night. I've completely lost the ability to connect with a guy and build a connection with him on a deeper emotional level.

This brings me to the second thing that My Hebrew Friend made me realize. I'm ready to be someone's girlfriend again. I don't mean in the high school way where we have to spend every waking moment together or always talk on the phone or even think about him being "the one". I'm not husband hunting, I'm just ready to let myself start looking for someone that I can share things with and be comfortable around enough to tell the things about myself that I don't share with my best friends. I want someone I know I can call when I need to hear a comforting voice, someone who I can make dinner for, someone who likes to go see awesome movies with, and take walks around the park with me. Or maybe not any of these things at all, just having a comfortable ease and rapport with person would be a good place to start. I'm ready for that moment in (500) Days of Summer when Summer finally allows Tom to see her apartment. For too long I've played Summer keeping men at a distance, only loving myself and never fulling developing a connection with them. I'm not even as willing as she is to go out and spend time with Tom, I want to be like that again. I just need a little help with this. I need to be more willing to go out and meet people. I want to be in a relationship again, I want to not jump in bed with him as soon as I meet him and if I do I want to be able to let myself let something grow between us. I'm tired of being Hank. I've let myself ruin too many friendships with guys including My Hebrew Friend and Ginger Dan because I didn't really pay attention and just let myself act the way I have conditioned myself to believe the way I should. Only lately have I repaired things with My Hebrew Friend to the point where I am comfortable enough to be around him him alone or more than a few minutes. With Ginger Dan we're still not where we used to be before I let things get so fucked up, but it's improving little by little.

I'm not going to jump into a relationship with the first guy I meet. I can't do that, I just know that it will be one of those things that goes nowhere and that they won't have been the person that I was looking for. I need to let myself be more selective about the men I meet. So I'm going to work on that and just try to see what can happen because by the time I'm ready to leave for Portland I'd really like there to be reason for me to consider staying here for a little longer or even have someone who would entertain the idea of wanting to come visit me while I'm there. I have a lot to work on.

I'm also thinking of changing my hair again. I'm not entirely sure I look good with longer hair. 

Rest and relaxation, but no red wine.

I'm not going to lie as much as I love going out after work with friends, I'm really loving that I decided to come home and just sit in bed for a little bit and let my body unravel. I have the pillows all arranged nicely and supportively on my back, the comforters and really fluffy and spread out at the bottom of the bed supporting my legs and the paper lanterns above the mirror fill the room with a gentle glow. I still have a few things to do around the apartment: pick up my room, make something to eat, and clean up the giant pile of things I pulled out of my utility closet this morning in search of duck tape. Usually on a night like this I would call My Hebrew Friend or Marg and see if they wanted to come over and watch movies and indulge in red wine, but I saw My Hebrew Friend yesterday and Marg's spending the weekend at Drexel and I'm out of red wine. Tonight is for me and my chance to just get to rest and relax on my own. I may even sleep in tomorrow past 8am. For now though I'm content just to sit here and write.

I received an update on the good news from earlier this week. I am no longer going to have to be unemployed. In fact that's exactly what I shouted out at Willa Cather today before we epically high fived in front of several perplexed customers. Now she just needs to solve her set of anxieties and we'd all be set. After Willa left though I slowly started to melt into the floor. My converses were a poor choice to wear especially since they are so worn out and old that I would rather cut my feet off right now than have to put them on again. It got very very slow almost to the point where I could have just stayed in the back all night and no one would have noticed. I let Ruth leave early, it was that slow. I kind of wish she had stayed because after she left The Prophet started chatting me up and it was kind of annoying. Ever since Yonni pointed something out to me I've become more aware about how oblivious I am about guys. Honestly when I got together with a guy this past fall I had no idea that that was his intention until it happened. Unless I'm the person going after something I rarely have any idea about what is going on around me when it concerns me. Total fail and now I'm starting to wonder how many opportunities I passed up because of my total obliviousness. Anyways I like to look at The Prophet, he's pretty but he's had odd interactions with some of my friends and it's best to just keep him at a distance at all times.

Yesterday at work Zach Galiafinakis told me about a movie called Peggy Sue Got Married. He told me not to be fooled by the title and that it was actually a really great movie. Another coworker also chimed in and said that it was not what you would expect and that it is actually a very well done movie. I think I'm going to watch it tonight. I need to take a break from Murder, She Wrote.

Learning the finer points of automotive repair.

Post coming soon. Most likely tonight after work or tomorrow morning.

Green Portuguese Beer

I'm not Irish and I'm not at Bala right now getting schwasted with the rest of my school's student body (the ones over 21 of course). The only green I have is a shirt that I got from a charity in India that read: Keep Calm and Carry On. Today I am sitting at other work writing this because there is nothing to do in the office other than eat copious amounts of Irish food and the leprechaun cake. Now I wish I had the balls to skip Sophomore Sem and go to Bala with KatWoman but I we have our papers due today and I have a deep fear of the teacher. Love her, but terribly afraid to skip out on her.

Okay so on top of all of the Irish foodies that I've been indulging in this morning, a girl from one of the classrooms came into the office and told us that there was Portuguese food in 313. Half the office immediately went out to investigate and since I have never really had any authentic Portuguese food so I got some too. Interesting mix of meats and seafoods all of it very good but it was all a little hard to finish. So much food in the office today.

I have to work today. My days at work at numbered dun dun dunnnnn. Tonight Other Jon and I are going out and hopefully some other people are going to come too. I told him we have to see if we can get the bar to give us green beer. A little food coloring to some PBR would be fantastic. I just need to finish the day stronger than it started.

              Yummy!

Kind of an Eeyore day.

Today was kind of a lame day. Maybe it was the weather, coming from total sunshine to total grey can be hard on a person, but I just haven't been able to get excited to about anything or the urge to actually get anything done. In fact I'm only writing out of boredom and desperation. The morning started out okay, I got up at a decent hour and drove to school. I got lucky with parking on Old Lanc and went for a run around Lower Merion before class. I like running in that area; I can look at the old houses and it's very quiet at that time of day.

American Lit. was boring as usual. You could literally hear students drift off. The class wouldn't be so terrible except that the teacher speaks in the most monotonous voice and goes off on tangents that are not related to what is going on in the class. And then of course there's That Guy. That Guy likes to talk, a lot. And he has one of those pretentious voices that everyone hates to listen too. After class when I was walking back to my car alone, a car full of guy yelled "SLUT" at me while they drove past. That's where the day went downhill for me. There was no one around me so they were obviously talking about me, but I had no idea who they were or what they were even talking about. It's not like I was dressed provocatively: sweatshirt, running pants, and sneakers. I was sweaty and my glasses were sliding off my face. I was so taken back that my mouth hit the ground and I couldn't move for a minute while I tried to comprehend what happened. Who yells stuff like that at people? What are you, eleven? Anyways I wanted to tell a friend about it since he usually has smart opinions and is a guy, but I've been getting a weird feeling about him (probably just the day and I'm probably reading too much into his writing tone. I need to stop listening to the Ballerina when she talks about him) so I texted Marg instead who insisted they were just being plain RUDE. Still I'm feeling really mad about it and all I want to do is go to sleep and wake up  ready to go running for BOMF.

I also have a giant know feeling in my stomach area and it's making me feel worse about the day. I just feel so crummy and I want to cry, but everything seems too silly to cry about and I feel like I shouldn't waste tears on such silly things. It's just the day after all. Tomorrow will be something new and all the silly feelings I have about school and work and my friends will be gone. I'm just really smad about how the day is going.

There were two spots of silver in my dark cloud: Jon is excited about going to see Matt & Kim (now we just need to raise some funds to get tickets and get more people to go with us) and I got a second interview. 

Two of two.

MATT AND KIM ARE COMING BACK TO PHILADELPHIA AND I AM GOING TO GO SEE THEM!!! Matt and Kim are playing at The Troc at the end of May and my friend Jon and I are going even if I have to drag him there. He's the only other person that I know that loves them almost as much as me so he's coming. You can't go to their shows alone, it's just not fun.

So this one was supposed to go up a while ago and then again last night as a complimentary piece to the first one but then I never got around to it.

I'm watching Julie & Julia right now (for the third time) and I have to admit that I kind of forgot how amazing this movie is. I absolutely hate Julie Powell for being a giant cheating whore in real life, but I really love what she did with her cooking blog. I also adore Julia Child ever since I used to watch her cooking show on PBS with my Dad. When I was little that's all we did, watch Julia Child and The Frugal Gourmet while Samantha napped.

Anyways I love this movie because of the dual stories that it portrays. In one you're watching a woman come from nothing and become a world-wide phenomenon. She has the most amazing marriage and life and her journey through the food world is simple inspirational. She also shares an extreme love of Valentine's day with me. I love the dinner that she hold where everyone wears large red hearts on their chests and when her husband Paul stands up to say beautiful words about her, she flutters her red heart for him. So romantic. She also sends out cute Valentine's postcards of Paul and her to all their friends. 

"You know what I love about cooking? I love that after a day when nothing is sure and when I say nothing, I mean nothing. You can come home and absolutely know that if you add egg yolks to chocolate and sugar and milk, it will get thick. That's such a comfort."

The other story follows a woman who literally has to her rock bottom in her life before she can pick herself up and be satisfied with her life, all while cooking a year's worth of Julia Child recipes. She is not the best character, but she is a human one with flaws that we all have and she is relatable to most people. I did love her apartment ad if she could make it work in her tiny tiny kitchen I can do it in mine. 

"You can never have too much butter."

The thing I love most about this movie is the relationships that the characters have with each other. For me the most relatable is Julie and her mother. The conversation about Julie's blog in the beginning and the talk about regimins and AA and Julie's mother takes something and goes in a totally opposite direction and misses the point; I can't tell you how many times I have conversations like that with my own mother. It's a wonder I still bother to tell her about the goings-on in my life. I deeply, deeply adore Julia and Paul's marriage. It is so filled with love and care. They perfectly compliment each other. It is really rare to see that sort of love and happiness and outside of this movie the only other marriage that comes close is Lance and Mary Ann. I really love/hate the Powell's marriage as well. The fact that Eric stuck through the Julie/Julia Project and Julie's infidelity is really cool. I love that when they fight, he fights back and stands up for themselves. Too many people are willing to be walked all over because they are too afraid to mess things up. People also put others up on pedestals and people can't handle it. We all do it and when we finally crack we don't always stand up for ourselves. Props to Eric for reminding Julie that he wasn't a saint. I love Chris Messina's portrayal of Eric. He is the man I want. Dark hair and nicely shaped and an excellent sense of humor. Lobster killer qu-est que c'est! He also has a cool job as an editor at an archaeological magazine. I need to meet someone like that and go get some beer and crab legs with them. It's the relationships that make this movie.

If you haven't seen it yet, rent it soon.

"These damn things are as hot as a stiff cock!"

I was reminded of something funny this weekend. My friend Ianni celebrated a milestone birthday and got very very inebriated. Reminded me of a time in high school after we had gotten back from Greece. I was sitting on a bench outside of Sloane's and everything was spinning. Ianni sat down next to me and started talking about Greece and graduation when all of the sudden I ralphed all over the side of the bench. Ianni was stunned and so were Katherine and Josh who were fighting in the car in front of us. Funny how things worked out with us. Two of them in Vermont, one in the army and engaged to be married and me in Philadelphia already planning the move to Portland.

First of two.

I was going to write about Julia but I just can't bring myself to finish it without watching the movie again which I'll do a little later tonight. Instead I'm eating artichoke hearts out of the can and watching old episodes of Murder, She Wrote. I still have five more seasons to go so at this rate I'll be done by May.

I'm not going to lie, I've become a little disheartened by blogging. I just don't see the point of writing about every insipid thing that passes through my mind. Maybe it's just the Ides of March approaching soon or the other blogs that I've been reading are seeming a little pointless, but I just don't want to write anymore. I think if I'm going to keep going I'm going to have to start some sort of routine or have a sort of theme to this. Maybe a certain devoted to a specific topic or I should start regularly chronicling about the things I have going on in my life. I've spent the last couple of months glued to the wedding plans of Beantownprepster and while I have no such plans of my own, her regular updates were fun to follow. I also may blog a little less until I can come up with a new direction. So eventually look for something a little different. Spring is only a week away which means a new theme update too.

I received a lead on some good news today hopefully it will turn into something. 

Day Nine: Home.

Days eight and nine were mostly travel days. I spent early Friday packing and wandering around the islands for a little while. We had lunch at the marina and then lounged around for a while. We were on the road by 4pm and I must say that driving through Florida is the most boring of all drives. I fell asleep at some point and when I woke up around 9pm we were only in Vero Beach (another of Lance's many brief stops before my mother) however, we did get to stop at Steak 'n Shake for dinner so I was extremely pleased. I fell asleep again soon after and didn't wake up until Washington D.C. and my then I didn't care because I knew exactly where I was on the map. I find it easier to travel long distances with my family when I can track exactly where were are and how long it will be until the car officially stops.

Day Seven: Lost at sea.

So this morning we decided to go over to Sombrero Beach off the bottom end of Vaca and almost against Boot Key. It's a great beach with palm trees lining the edge instead of sand dunes and a long expanse of white sand. It used to be coral beach but has been replaced with some very nice sand. The beach also has small pavilions for luncheons and areas for volley ball and a place for small children to play. It's also one of the very few excellent and free beaches in the Keys. About two hours into some fabulous beach time, tropical storm force winds came in and blew everyone off of the beach. Now this wouldn't be a problem for me, but Lance and Samantha were out at sea kayaking when this happened. My mother of course was on the phone at the time and left me to pack everything up and it wasn't until the beach umbrella was half blown apart that she got off the phone and went right into panic mode. I had to be the voice of reason and snap her out of it. Seriously if there was anyone in the world that you would want to be lost at sea with in a kayak, it's Lance. Mind you if I were Lance I definitely wouldn't want to be stuck with Samantha. Anyways I managed to pack everything up and get a hysterical quinquagenarian to the car to wait for the kayakers to return.

To end the exhausting day and to celebrate our last night in the house, I was rewarded with some fine spiny lobster. I'm going to huff it back over to Sombrero in the morning o get some sun in before I have to return to the great wet Mid-Atlantic.

A pleasant start to a beach day.

The backside of Sombrero.

Smoothing and expanding the beach. 

Sailboat! There was also a dolphin out there somewhere too. 

Storm's a brewin'. Get off the phone MA I'm already feeling rain.

From inside the car. This started long before I made it to the Silver Bullet. 

I broke away from studying to find a pleasant surprise in the pot. 

Day Six: 1983

Today my mother took me around the island to all of the places that she and her friends lived and worked. We spent the day mostly down on the southern end of the island by Sombrero Beach and the marina. My mother came to the Keys after a brief stint in Virginia Beach and stayed for almost two years until she and Lance decided to get married in 1984. It took her a little while to find everything, with age comes memory loss, but eventually we got there and no stone was left untouched.

Where she worked when she first arrived. 

Pancho's, the place to be after work. 

The duplex apartment she shared with her roommate. 

Annette, my mother's roommate. 

What used to be the Captain's Galley where Lance worked. 

Lance's apartment on 11th Street. 

Herbies on Marathon

Herbies is a small shack off of Route 1 on Vaca Key in the city of Marathon. Small and without the pretentiousness of other established restaurants next door, Herbies serves simple, delicious food that has stood the test of time. Already a local institution in 1984, my mother took me back there today for lunch where it was still packed as ever. The menu is a simple selection of local seafood cooked to comfort and perfection and nothing suits your fancy Herbies will clean and blacken your catch of the day for only $10.

Daily specials.

Conch fritters the size of my fist.

Sparse decorations on plain walls, but we just came for the food.

Fried oyster sandwich.

Buoys hung on the walls. 

Day Five: Key Lime Pie

I know I said I was  going to do all these things today, but today ended up being a nothing day. Lance didn't really want to do anything but kayaking and reading and Samantha spent the entire first half of the day burning herself to a crisp. So after some sunning and napping I made a pie. There's something romantic about making a key lime pie in the Florida Keys. Very similar to camping at Walden Pond. I kind of really wish Marg were here right now. Family time is fun for a little while but now I wish I had someone to cavort around the islands with. Or at least have a bicycle.

I think I made the key lime pie too key limey. 

Day Four: Key West

Today it was a little too cold and windy for a beach day so we drove down to Key West. Way too many cruise ships and college students for my liking but plenty of bad graphic t-shirts for Lance and rum runners for my mother. Got my hands on some conch, more tomorrow and a better beach.

Old Seven Mile bridge.

Hey Cuba! We see you!

Fully took advantage of the open container laws today.

Mile Maker Zero.

Literary Mecca: Hemingway's House.

Hemingway's dead cats. 

Sunset on the ride home (Samantha took this, I was passed out in the car).

Day Three: First Full Day

Finally a first full day of Key Colony. Cheryl dropped by yesterday and stayed until this evening. It was a low key Sunday with some kayaking, beach time, and late afternoon tennis. I finally got to sleep in, but now that Pete's posted the runs for the week I'll be up early and out on the pavement before it get's too hot. High of 85 F today and expected thunderstorms overnight.

Plenty of boats out on the ocean side today. 

Small jetties break up the beach with long piers at the end of them.

Cabana Club on the beach. Not my favorite beach, small and crowded isn't my thing. I want to go over to Sombrero tomorrow. 

Red skies at night sailors' delight!

Cheryl came to visit!

Day Two: Getting better.

Day two was much better. I woke up somewhere in a Denny's parking lot, but I can still say that I have never been inside of one. I continued to finally get much needed sleep and woke up in the upper-middle Keys. 

After I woke up and started taking pictures of each key sign. 

Not yet on Vaca Key but Marathon seems to be taking over. 

Giant dolphin. Why not?

Finally a survivable temperature. 

The house for the week. Right on the canal and close to the beach. Lance and Samantha have already kayaked around Key Colony. 

Day One: Long long looooong.

So cold leaving Philadelphia.

I couldn't find the southbound sign from the car. 

Merrie's homeland!

Samantha found my camera.

Gas station in Georgia. I had just finished driving us through the Carolinas and everything seemed really funny at 2am. I found a neon Hooters sign that only had Hoot lit up.