Sleepy, cranky, and something in between.

Have you ever been so exhausted and drained to the point where you can't keep your eyes open, but once you lay down and actually want to go to sleep you find that you can't? Because that's me right now. I just want to get a couple of hours of sleep so that I can wake up early and finish some work and get a run in before class. I just need to get a little bit of sleep first and it's not happening. I've turned everything off, tired reading, classical music, opening my window, closing my window, and drinking water. Nothing is working and if I knew I could get eight hours in I would go for the codeine, but since I only get four at the most I have to work through this on my own. I need to reread The Art of War so that I can get control over my mind and bend my body to my will while at the same time learning how to conquer Mongolia.

Oh sleep! Where art thou? 

When I was young and naive I would have said arson, but now I say voodoo! - Louise

I'm writing in my living room right now. I have the lights off, the window is open wide, and there is a warm breezing coming in. It feels amazing. It's so quiet and relaxing just sitting here going over the day and getting ready for tomorrow. That is until some asshole pulls up to the building with their windows down and the music at full volume.


Jewish Girl In Wasps Clothing has a new blog called Heaven Health Me! and it's awesome, especially for someone who is struggling with changing her lifestyle and becoming healthier. And while I've been able to lose ten pounds relatively easy, I still need motivation and to know that there are other women out there trying to do the same thing. She's started out by doing a week of no sugar and documenting everything that she eats and what she does for exercise. She's done well so far with only a few cheats, but she doesn't seem to exercise a lot or at least not tell us about it. That's the one thing I have to push myself to accomplish. I've started running. I'm trying to run everyday because I've found when I tell myself I'll only run a certain number of day and end up procrastinating and putting it off. If I force myself to run everyday I won't be able to put it off until tomorrow. Today I did a little less than 2.5 miles according to mapmyrun.com. That's definitely the longest I've run without stopping, EVER. I'm going to try and get something in before class tomorrow morning otherwise I have to run on the treadmill before work. Damn me for telling Kyle I would take his shift. Actually I don't mind covering for him. Kyle's great and since I don't do anything on Tuesday's I'm happy to make some money. Just no coupons tomorrow, please.

JGIWC also mentioned in her blog that Passover is coming up. I miss Passover. I'm not an incredibly religious person. I find the history and the culture of religion to be more interesting than religion itself, but I always had a connection with the Easter season. Not a big fan of Christmas, but I always liked Easter and for more than just the awesome baskets that Lance makes. Seriously the guy is pro at putting together an Easter basket. Anyways Easter season always began for me at Passover when the church community would preform a Sedar meal. It was always an intense process with a lot of steps that began to become second nature as I got older. Over time the meal became more complex as the community grew larger to the point where people tried their hand at poor Hebrew and reciting prayers from memory. The older I got the more I understood the importance of each step in the meal its significance. I was never a huge fan of Palm Sunday other than the fun palms and the fact that it marked the beginning of Holy Week. The church also started to get decorated for Easter during Palm Sunday, however by Holy Thursday and Good Friday everything would be taken out and covered up. I always liked being an altar server during Holy Thursday and Good Friday because it made mass more interactive during the longer hour. Also by Friday the Passion is repeated a third and much longer time and by then even I found it to be a little exhausting. The close of Thursday and Friday were also really intense. Everyone leaves in silence and in the dark. The sticky sweet incense lingers in everyones's clothes and hair you're not allowed to make a sound until after you reach your car. Good Friday also marks the last Friday that I had to eat fish to dinner. I didn't go to Easter Vigil until I was in eight or ninth grade. Vigil is a three hour mass late on Saturday night. It's about reawakening in the Church and new members are baptized and confirmed. The church has started to fill back up with candles and flowers and by the time mass is over it's Easter Sunday. Sunday everything is in bloom. Candles and Easter lilies are everywhere and people are dressed in color. The statues and pictures are uncovered and everything seems to have life again. Easter is the spring bloom after a long Lenten season. After Easter comes Pentecost which deals with the aftermath of Jesus ascending into Heaven and how the Church developed afterwards, but you don't get a basket for that.