Monday, May 2, 2011

But it was not your fault but mine, it was your heart on the line, I really fucked it up this time.

Yonni said he felt like a machine the other day, today I feel like Richard's new broken down tractor that he wants to fix up. I haven't had real sleep yet and I don't see it happening tonight, but I do see a full day of it on Wednesday to get me rested before a full day of work on Wednesday. Shout out to Kyle T. for taking my shift tomorrow night because after I finish the first part of Friday's assignment and do my paper rewrite I am going to go to sleep and try my hardest not to wake up for at least eight hours.

I feel like my body is invincible but not in the good way like when you complete an intense workout or narrowly miss getting hit my a SEPTA bus. It's more of an ongoing thing with my body. Like if I were to just shut down and the life flickered away form my eyes, by body would still keep on chugging at a slower sluggish pace but without a soul. I would be Dudley is if Harry hadn't been able to save him from the Dementors. But a thousand times skinnier and a girl. This morning I was in between projects so I decided to rest my eyes and listen to the creepy South Park episode with the demon Christmas animals. I was just lying in bed when my stomach filled with intense pain and I ended up spending the next hour vomiting in my tiny bathroom. I even brought my laptop in with me so I could listen, puke, do work, and shoot off some e-mails. I am quite the multitasker when I want to be.

I'm still in a little bit of shock about the whole bin Laden thing. I was completely unaware of it until I checked facebook before I went to class. They were talking about it on the radio while I drove to class and I have to admit that I got a little teary about everything. It's a strange feeling.

My American Lit. exam went well my the way Mom.

After the exam I ran some errands and then went to the airport with my journalism group. We're doing a story on the new mural that is being painted on the side of one of the parking garages as a part of the Philly Mural Arts program. We got too interview the lead artist (so cute and a ginger!) and take photos and video of the team working. John talked us through the project and how they have been basically wallpapering the side of a parking garage for the last month. It's a really fascinating and cool thing that they're working on and I'll tell you more about it once the journalism project is finished on Friday.

I came home from the airport and had a strong desire for strawberries and orange seltzer water so I stopped at Path Mark and loaded up and then went home. I think the combination of no sleep, sun, and moderate dehydration wiped me out because I downed a liter of seltzer, put on I'm Reed Fish and then promptly fell asleep for  few hours. I only woke up because Yonni and my mom ha texted me and my phone kept buzzing. When I woke woke up I thought it was already tomorrow and I panicked. It took me several minutes to calm myself down and not start crying. I decided to go visit Yonni at work instead of freak out. I brought him some of the strawberries I bought today and the chocolate I got at the Wilbur factory out in Lancaster because he said he was so drained and I wanted to bring him a pick-me-up.

I spent way more time at Borders than I had planned, but it was good because we haven't seen each other in a while because of all the madness of end of the year stuff and finals. I think it was good for him too. He's been reaching out to me more than usual lately. I don't mind because I love my friends and I'm always willing to listen when they need to talk about something and I'm secretly an old lonely lady on the inside, desperate for company. On my way home I ran over roadkill which made me feel a little terrible for running over the body of something. I swear I didn't see it until the very last second. Of course Yonni had to call and make fun of me, but it's all good.

I'm watching I'm Reed Fish right now. It was Alexis Bledel in it. I don't really like her since Gilmore Girls because she seems to be only a one trick pony when it comes to her acting. Katey Sagal plays the quirky town mayor and Jay Baruchel is the title character. I have had a secret crush on him since I saw him as super lame Tal in Nick and Norah. He's one of those awkward guilty pleasures of mine like Michael Cera or Christopher Mintze-Plasse. I watched The Town yesterday. Great movie. I wasn't expecting a lot from Ben Affleck, but that movie had to be his best work to date. He was great, the whole cast was great, and deep down I really hope that Claire went to Tangerine too.

I want a hug right now. I was going to get one tonight, but I was in a public place and hugging in public places is kind of like kissing in public places and being someone who is trying to go through life as anonymously as possible, I don't like to draw attention like that. That's why I stick to the internet. And if I need a hug now, by the end of the week I'm going to need someone to lie on top of me. I respond well to being slightly crushed, it calms my system and relaxes my body. Maybe I'll just lay down in front of the elephant at the zoo.

Mumford came on the radio earlier so that explains the title tonight.