I had two things I was thinking about earlier today and one of the I completely forgot about. One was about me and the other one was probably about about me but not so indirectly, but then I forgot about it. So instead I will share my joy that I got to color in class today. My teacher brought in a 64 count box of crayons and I went to town depicting a scene from Heart of Darkness. And now that I am writing this I realized that the other thing was about my new path as short pulp fiction writer. Apparently my classmates really enjoyed the idea with my story, but they were conflicted about whether they thought it should be dark and mysterious or hammy and ridiculous. On guy thought that it had a pulpy vibe to it and so my teacher has tasked me with making it over the top and to push it to the limits of ridiculousness. I may even have to reference Samuel L. Jackson or a ridiculous vampire movie. We shall see. It also means more work for My Hebrew Friend who I've gotten for be my chief source of criticisms and suggestions with this piece. I struggle with fiction more so than with other genres and I need him to make sure things don't get too out of hand.
The other thing that I was thinking about was relationship and how I sort of accidentally fall into them. My friends are all in different stages in their lives and in different places in the world of romance, but none of them seem to have the same process as me. Of course it's all the same for every one: person meets person. For me though I can't seem to just meet a person and instantly be dating them. I start out as friends and over time something changes for me and I start to see them differently and somehow we end up as more than where we started. Right now most of the guys that I am close with are already with other people or I haven't found the others to be right for me in that way yet. It's a particular process for me somehow that I still can't seem to nail down. I'm kind of nervous though because what if I finally end up with someone right before I have to leave. Conundrum. But also a bridge that I'll cross if it gets to that. I'm finally in a good place with Yonni where I feel comfortable alone with him to be myself without the pretensions of sex looming over us, or my need to not say anything wrong around him, or doing something that would make him not like me. It's taken awhile, but now I don't feel bad critiquing him about something or telling him about anything. It's the same with Dan. I wrote a story about us for my non-fiction piece. Andi says that he will be one of those guys I will always "feel something for" but writing that story was like letting go of a lot of stuff that I was holding on to. Growing my hair out was like a liberation from him.
Okay so I never really finished, I just stopped and went to work instead of just saving. The best part of the day after coloring with crayons and the discussion I had with Amy in class about how desirable Marlon Brando is in Streetcar despite how crazy the character and the Dr. Green agreeing with us and then it turning to Marlon Brando weighing 200 pounds more than he was supposed to for Apocalypse Now which was mot excellent, was my trip to sketchy Kohl's down on Township Line. Seriously this store looks so out of the place on the side of the road. It looks like it's in a small field on the edge of a swamp. But that's DelCo for you. Anyways...women have stopped dressing formal in the work place I have found. I couldn't find a white button down anywhere. At least not a white collared one with a breast pocket. And believe me I tried Ross, two Targets, and a TJ Maxx. I had to shop the little boys department to find something that would fit. So so sad. But it's nice to know I not too fat that I have to shop in the men's section.
Also I have a killer sore throat and Arcade Fire's We Used to Wait is my new crack.
The other thing that I was thinking about was relationship and how I sort of accidentally fall into them. My friends are all in different stages in their lives and in different places in the world of romance, but none of them seem to have the same process as me. Of course it's all the same for every one: person meets person. For me though I can't seem to just meet a person and instantly be dating them. I start out as friends and over time something changes for me and I start to see them differently and somehow we end up as more than where we started. Right now most of the guys that I am close with are already with other people or I haven't found the others to be right for me in that way yet. It's a particular process for me somehow that I still can't seem to nail down. I'm kind of nervous though because what if I finally end up with someone right before I have to leave. Conundrum. But also a bridge that I'll cross if it gets to that. I'm finally in a good place with Yonni where I feel comfortable alone with him to be myself without the pretensions of sex looming over us, or my need to not say anything wrong around him, or doing something that would make him not like me. It's taken awhile, but now I don't feel bad critiquing him about something or telling him about anything. It's the same with Dan. I wrote a story about us for my non-fiction piece. Andi says that he will be one of those guys I will always "feel something for" but writing that story was like letting go of a lot of stuff that I was holding on to. Growing my hair out was like a liberation from him.
Okay so I never really finished, I just stopped and went to work instead of just saving. The best part of the day after coloring with crayons and the discussion I had with Amy in class about how desirable Marlon Brando is in Streetcar despite how crazy the character and the Dr. Green agreeing with us and then it turning to Marlon Brando weighing 200 pounds more than he was supposed to for Apocalypse Now which was mot excellent, was my trip to sketchy Kohl's down on Township Line. Seriously this store looks so out of the place on the side of the road. It looks like it's in a small field on the edge of a swamp. But that's DelCo for you. Anyways...women have stopped dressing formal in the work place I have found. I couldn't find a white button down anywhere. At least not a white collared one with a breast pocket. And believe me I tried Ross, two Targets, and a TJ Maxx. I had to shop the little boys department to find something that would fit. So so sad. But it's nice to know I not too fat that I have to shop in the men's section.
Also I have a killer sore throat and Arcade Fire's We Used to Wait is my new crack.
