And if you feel just like a tourist in the city you were born, then it's time to go and define your destination. There's so many different places to call home.

I had an epic day at the beach today. EPIC DAY! It started off slow because someone forgot to get up this morning. I mean honestly, who forgets the last beach day of the summer? Anyways  once we got on the road and actually got there it was amazing. The sunny was out and there was a strong breeze to keep the heat down. Unfortunately the wind was a little too strong for frisbee, but now that it's school time we can play on the fields. Woo woot. The water was perfect though. After the initial shock of the cold water against my skin I hated to get out. The current was a little too strong for me to be comfortable swimming alone so I had to keep getting out when Yonni did, but eventually I just said fuck it and went in. Apparently the bear's fur is just for aesthetics because he kept getting cold in the water. The trick: just stay below the surface. Afterwards we made a quick stop to the uncle's to return the beach chair that has been living in the back of my car all summer. I get to keep the key though. Coming down we saw White Castle off of 37 and decided to Harold and Kumar it there later. Since Yon is nice and dark I am left to be Harold. Yipee. White Castle is not as good as I remember it being from when I was younger and it's no surprise that Lance hasn't eaten there in thirty years. And to top it off none of the Harold and Kumar movies are instant on Netflix. Despite that small setback and two cups of milky sugary coffee from Dunkin' I had a really nice ride back to the city with Yonni and I'm decently tuckered out that I might get a good night's sleep for a change. I'm sad that there won't be anymore beach days for a while, but I'm glad that I was able to end the summer with a satisfiable bang. Next week classes start.

Sweet potato fries?

After raiding my parent's DVD collection back home I have rediscovered my love of The O.C. What a great show about one of the most pointless places on the planet. Somehow FOX knew that people would be obsessed especially when they're from a small, cold New England town. My entire high school was captivated by this show when it was on the air and since it played on FOX you had no excuse not to watch it. My favorite season was the fourth because there was no Mischa Barton. I know the whole premise of the show revolved around but I couldn't stand Marissa Cooper at all.  I was definitely a Summer girl.  Actually I was a Seth Cohen girl. That character was my dream guy and the peak of Adam Brody perfection. The fourth season was also when Ryan finally got himself a decent and very hot haircut.

I got my first email from the school reminding me to fill out my intent to graduate form and remember to pick up my cap and gown in a few weeks for senior photos. Ugh. This blows, but it also means that the days are finally counting down until when I am done with school and off to see the world somewhere else. I had a mini chat with a friend today about where I would go. I don't think that he is keen about e packing up and leaving because he kept saying that I could stay here and work or go to grad school. Sometimes I think he doesn't know what to do with me. I'm not like a lot of the other people that he can put in a box and know where they're always going to be. I'm more like a caged bunny that rattles around in the box and knocks other stuff down or like a square peg in a round hole. There's not a very good definition out there for me. I need to get out of here for a little while, but for the first time I actually admitted out loud that I wouldn't mind returning to Philadelphia (or the greater area) to go to school or work once I've had an adventure or two. Sometimes I just wish I could pack people up and take them with me. For now though I need to focus on school and remember to fill out my intent to graduate form on time. 

Next time you're in Upper Darby you better let me know. I'm about to get laid off and I live with my mom.

The heartland of Uzbekistan is the Fergana Valley. Located across most of the country, this valley is extremely fertile and protected by mountains at the north and at the south. Two rivers run through the valley supplying life to area. Once part of the Northern Silk Road, it sustains the country's silk industry. It is a beautiful part of a often overlooked country in western Asia. I want to go to Uzbekistan and see the Fergana Valley. I want to stay in a yurt and hike through the mountains and travel along the rivers.

Fergana Valley

I just got back recently from a trip to Ocean City, NJ with my Hebrew Friend to see some friends who are staying at the shore for the week. It was the perfect day for the shore. Completely flawless skies and just the right amount of waves to go swimming and body surfing. We left the city early and were able to have a full rich day in Jersey. The shore was not too crowded, kind of like going to the Park on a weekend when the state park is too full to get into. We were all able to swim (those of us that actually like water), read, rest, and play Frisbee. Hebrew Friend taught me to play football though I still need some help with my catching and aim. He and I are going to have to go throw a ball around when I get back from Vermont (I'm not terribly excited about driving home alone tomorrow evening). Mini golf and pizza concluded our day and I did get a chance to see Chem Anna in action at the coffee shop. On the way home I nearly fell asleep, but then had a extremely enlightening experience with a friend. 

Yes I was with this person and yes he wore socks and shoes on the beach.

This time last year Chem Anna began her senior freak out. She would unexpectedly cry and fret about the idea of leaving school and getting into grad school. She had a hard time letting go of her safety net and preparing for the scariness of the real world. I though she and my other senior friends were crazy for crying about leaving school. They were only nine months away from no more homework. I thought that they should be celebrating and not mourning. Now that it's my turn, I feel even less prepared and successful than Chem Anna and some of my other friends who recently graduated. I just cry and cry at unexpected moments about school and the paths I've taken and how my life is going to turn out at the end of the next nine months. I'm scared about graduating especially since I will only have been working at my chosen major for three semesters. I don't have enough material for a portfolio to send to graduate schools and I haven't started studying for the GREs. I'm also terrified about leaving because I don't know where I'm going and I know I can't go home. I also don't want to leave my best friend. For the first time I have someone that I am unconditionally close to and I'm not quite prepared to put any distance between us. When I was in Vermont last time Lance said some very sage words to me: "Most choices aren't wrong, they're just not right." The decisions that I've made may not have been the best or the wisest for me but they've led me to finding a passion or two and to Yonni and to new skills. I'm just waiting for when I can start making the right choices the first time around.